Monday funnies

I think life is too grim, and since I blew most of today on actual work (yeah, I know, what was I thinking?) I am going to just pass this along today and find something more serious to blog about tomorrow. Thanks to Murray Meszaros for sending it:

The economy is so bad that:

I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

When I ordered a burger at McDonald’s and the kid behind the counter asked, “Can you afford fries with that?”

CEO’s are now playing miniature golf.

If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient Funds,” you call them and ask if they meant you or them.

Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than GM.

McDonald’s is now selling the 1/4 ouncer.
 
Parents in  Beverly Hills  fired their nannies and learned their children’s names.

A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into  Mexico  .

Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting.

Motel Six won’t leave the light on anymore.

The Mafia is laying off judges and Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.

Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal.
Oh Great!! The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!

And, finally…

I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Lifeline. I got a call center in  Pakistan , and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.  

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One Response to Monday funnies

  1. flatlander100 says:

    “Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.”

    Perfect. TY.

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