Are you confident enough as a male to make less than her?

I love it when societal norms are tweaked.

Consider this story in which it is found that an increasingly large number of men are improving their financial situation when they get married because wifey makes more than they do. One of the several reasons given is that wifey is smarter than hubby and so has a job that pays more.

Although, inevitably, the mean wages for women is still less than for men, meaning women with equal brainpower still make less. Total equality still eludes us.

Speaking for myself, I’m just fine with my wife making more than I do. She’s held four different jobs, counting her current one, since we got married. In each job she started out making less than I was, but by the time she left she was making more. This speaks both to the rapidity at which her talents were recognized and, let’s be honest, the stagnation that is journalism today.  I used to say editors had a cross stick over their desks that said “You didn’t go into journalism to get rich.” Now it says “Be glad you have a job.”

Getting back to the main subject — I’d like to hear from you — how do you feel? If your wife makes more than you do, are you happy? Threatened? Jealous? Too dim to notice?

I’m not going to get involved in that whole “wife is smarter” part of the survey — heck, I’ve known that for years, and so has any other male of the species who wasn’t a complete dimwit. My wife getting a Ph.D. has nothing to do with that, either.

So, how do you feel? Post thoughts here or send to

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3 Responses to Are you confident enough as a male to make less than her?

  1. Jim Hutchins says:

    My wife and I have done this. At various points over the last 25 years of marriage, she has made more or I have. In my view, the whole point of marriage is to determine “what’s best for the BOTH of us” which is not always what is best for me, individually, or what is best for her, individually. With the big decisions like which job to take or where to move, it has always been a joint decision based on what works for the couple.

  2. Neal Humphrey says:

    I’m the pastor of a Protestant church. My wife is a financial director with a major corporation (2nd or 3rd largest employer in Utah). Our salaries inverted the day I entered seminary over 20 years ago. We’ve been married over four decades. She keeps me in the style and comfort to which I’ve become accustomed.

  3. flatlander100 says:

    At times, Mah Woman has earned more than I did, at times not. Since whatever either of us earned was [and is] our money, it didn’t seem to matter much who was bringing in more at any given moment.

    As I commence further and further into geezerhood, I would be overjoyed to have her earn enough to keep me in the manner to which I long to become accustomed.

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